“gave more than i should”

i can hear your whispers in the hallways
i can feel your breath on my neck
i see a wisp of smoke from your mouth
as you put another red coat on your lips
you stand there so seductively
almost out of reach
the sweat is dripping down your neck
and i want to taste the salt

you take more than i can give
and i give more than i should
our bodies are coming together
and the lights slowly dim

or maybe it’s the smoke in my eyes
but the air becomes thick
you tear at your clothes,
which have suddenly become too tight
your nymphomanical aura
quickly fills the room
you wondering at the feeling
and enjoy it all the while

you’re taking all i give
and i’m giving more than i should
i can feel us coming together
and i know there’s something more

maybe it’s your glistening body
or maybe its the demeanor of the room
but something here is changing
faster than we can comprehend
the doors are quickly closing
despite what’s going on
but there’s no real reason
to leave yet

and you took all that i gave
and i gave more than i should
our bodies came together
and it meant more than it should

“suicide shoes”

between a rock and hell
somewhere swallowed in my libido
there’s a life full of lust
waiting to be destroyed
all it takes is one single night
of hedonistic lust
that’s all that it takes
and your life turns to dust

suicide shoes
dancing yourself to death
there’s nothing you can do
but march without rest

drowning in your own iniquities
turning pale from your lack of pain
lost in your own misunderstanding
and lost in her eyes
she takes on whatever form she wants
so deceptive, and beautiful
and the next thing you know
is how you wish she were merciful

suicide shoes
dancing yourself to death
there’s nothing you can do
but march without rest

you’ve entered your own tartarus
the first step to hell
and regardless of how you try
there’s no losing the shell
to be stuck in your own graveyard
digging your own grave
of all the people you’ve help
you’re the only one you can’t save

suicide shoes
dancing yourself to death
there’s nothing you can do
but march without rest

“everything is empty to me”

everything i hear is white noise to me
i know it’s real, but its a dream to me
at least it has to be
the way it all feels for me

almost feel empty, but i know it’s real
everyone reacts, but there’s nothing i feel
although i know it’s real
but it’s no big deal to me

because everything is empty to me
i can feel the warmth surround my body
but it never lasts
because everything is empty to me

i look around, and i’m losing sight
no sweet dreams for me tonight
i’ve almost got no reason to fight
because nothing today feels quite all right

i feel see-through, but i know it’s real
everyone reacts, but there’s nothing i feel
although i know it’s real
but in the end it’s no big deal

because everything is empty to me
i can feel the warmth surround my body
but it never lasts
because everything is empty to me

i’m losing touch with life around
i walk around without touching the ground
nothing i do will make a sound
so why the hell am i still around?

i look around, and not a thing i feel
everyone reacts, but there’s nothing i feel
i know it’s got to be real
but i don’t really care, cuz it’s no big deal….

because everything is empty to me
i can feel the warmth surround my body
but it never lasts
because everything is empty to me

imperfect

nothing i can do would ever be enough
the path of righteousness is far too rough
then why try for redemption
when i’m still eating from a trough?
living in a world of my own creation
where even i am just a patron
not even the will to become any more
the lowest part of the fraction

imperfect
this lowly mortal soul
a point of non-existence
the path of least resistance

“disintegrating heart”

i can almost feel the burning
tearing me apart
there’s no end to the fighting
deep inside my chest
i can feel the jagged arrows
they’re flying through my head
this battle is continuous
no ending, or rest

the divisions within my mind
sanctioned through my head
are leaving me with nothing
left within this sombre town
my stomach now is churning
tearing itself apart
i can feel my head get heavy
from the weight of my own crown

you see the tears streaming down
yet i stand here all alone
left to my own devices
and falling apart
can’t you take my hand,
relieve some of the pain?
help relieve the pressure
of my disintegrating heart.

“covered up by dirt”

they bathe themselves in ashes
and wash it off with blood
cover up with sackcloth
and moan at the temple guards
you’re the object of desire
too perfect to behold
they build a totem offering
so their god will not get cold

praise yourself
oh chosen one of earth
but all of your majesty
will be covered up by dirt

the cries around the temple
the peasants self-inflict
you sit back and enjoy it
while the quiet makes you sick
the suffering of others
is another sadistic treat
you watch from your throne
while your prophets burn their sacrificial meat

praise yourself
oh chosen one of earth
but all of your majesty
will be covered up by dirt

you laugh at foolish mortals
but you are one yourself
all of them are asking
for improvements on their health
you smile your little smile
while others cry in vain
and you know you can do nothing
to wash away their pain.

praise yourself
oh chosen one of earth
but all of your majesty
will be covered up by dirt

“slowly dying here”

it hurts to think about you
as you slowly fade away
i cannot keep my focus
it all turns to grey
my memories are fleeting
but it’s all that remains
and sometimes when i’m sleeping
even my heart is strained

i’m slowing dying here
without you by my side
i thought that i could fake it,
but it’s something i can’t hide

i’m so alone without you
it’s tearing me apart
i’m so empty of feeling
there’s a hole left in my heart
there’s so much space between us
you’re 10,000 miles away
but i know i have to be here
and there is no other way

i’m slowing dying here
without you by my side
i thought that i could fake it,
but it’s something i can’t hide

i try my best to clear my mind
but it hurts to close my eyes
i wish that i could change things
but there’s no point to even try
there’s some things we can’t control
the picture’s far to large
but you know i’d be there beside you
if i could just take charge

i’m slowing dying here
without you by my side
i thought that i could fake it,
but it’s something i can’t hide